Wednesday, January 21, 2015

The Benefits of Postponing Your Honeymoon

Hello, lovelies!

Today, I want to talk about a very personal, but exciting aspect of married life -- the honeymoon! Ah, what a splendid time the honeymoon phase is. Traditionally, honeymooners travel across the land, doe-eyed, and in love. They spend hours in splendor; basking in the joys of marriage. Sometimes they get too much sun and come home red as lobsters, others make the most of the expense and explore and some make camp in the hotel room and come out for the fancy buffets. :)

It really is a special time.

We went a different route. After being (unexpectedly) unemployed for several months, my beloved had just begun a new job. He didn't feel like it would be possible to take time off and, in all honesty, neither of us had money to travel.

But, boy, did we have a honeymoon.

At that time Dalton was living in our first rental, alone, while I lived with my family three hours away. He scrubbed, painted, and cleaned the bungalow from top to bottom in preparation for when I would come to live with him. After our wedding, I hopped into his white truck and we drove three hours northwest to our home.

And just like countless couples before us, Dalton carried me over the threshold and our honeymoon at home began.

Now, after eleven months of marriage, we are packing our bags, buying tickets, and preparing for our honeymoon away from home. And boy, are we excited!

Even though we are brimming with excitement, I think there were benefits from waiting for our big trip. Here are three benefits of postponing your honeymoon. Let me know what you think!

1. You enjoy each other without pressure

Traveling naturally creates pressure (and stress). Flying (or driving), checking in, and finding your way around a new environment can cause new couples extra stress that, although they're more than happy to deal with, doesn't have to be.

For Dalton and I, two very happy introverts, there was no place like home. We settled into each other (and our marriage) without the stress and pressure of the outside world. Although Jefferson City was new to me, Dalton knew the places I would want to visit, explore, and eat at so he spent the first few weeks making my time extra special. It was wonderful.

2. You know each other

Last night, as we were snuggling in bed, I told Dalton that my love for him had grown so much during our marriage that I wondered how it was possible that I loved him while we were dating -- my love is just so much greater and deeper than I ever thought possible! But that's what happens when you give love time -- it grows and multiplies.

When a couple first marries, you really don't know each other yet. Oh, you may know what your beliefs are, your plans, and how each of you think. But you haven't seen how your man handles throwing up, or for that matter, handles watching you throw up. You haven't seen him handle the in's and out's of finances. You haven't been humbled by his bravery and courage when he patiently waits for unanswered prayers and walks through broken dreams. You don't know him yet.

But you will.

For us, it was worth putting off an official honeymoon. We know and love each other far better then when we first said "I do."

And I think that knowledge will make our honeymoon even better.

3. You will enjoy your trip better

This last point may cause an incredulous, nervous shock to radiate among my dear conservative, homeschooling friends but I stand by it. Your honeymoon is about intimacy ... having sex with your beloved.

((GASP!)) ;)

But really, it is!

God designed marriage to be a beautiful, creative, sexual adventure for you and your spouse and, if you have followed His ways, your honeymoon will be the beginning to that amazing adventure. Of course, each couple is different, but for us it was important to give ourselves time. I can't imagine how stressful it would have been for me if we would have been honeymooning in the tropics and I would have known that at every moment there was some planned activity, some recreation, to partake in.

Of course, I know that it is totally possible to plan a beautiful honeymoon and not be roped into all the activities and adventures offered. But for me, it would have been stressful. I loved knowing that at anytime we could go explore our new town and then safely retire back to our cozy, little home and into my man's strong arms. Physical intimacy (and getting used to it) requires time and I am thankful for the time and freedom not being on a honeymoon offered.

Plus, now that we have been married for eleven months (and we're both fully used to and enjoying the intimate side of marriage ;) I know that we will be able to really enjoy our upcoming trip. :)

Dearhearts, what do you think? Did any of my points resonate with you? Or maybe you had the time of your life at your get-away honeymoon? Let me hear your thoughts -- I'd love to know!

With so much love and blueberry tea,


 

6 comments:

  1. Very sensible points Frannie. There is often such a build up to a wedding that the couple are too tired to enjoy a honeymoon.
    Enjoy yours!

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  2. I think you make some very good points, Frannie. Especially the traveling while tired thing. But like you said, it is possible to have a fantastic honeymoon, without all the fancy trimmings.

    Justin and I were able to go on our honeymoon, right after the wedding. We planned out our trip together. Both of us knew we wanted to be somewhere quiet and alone. We opted for a mountain cabin, that was very secluded (4 wheel drive was required to get to it). Oh, it had GORGEOUS scenery too!

    We only left the cabin twice (once to go hiking, and the other to find food!) in 5 days. Most of our time was spend lounging around, soaking in the hot tub, star gazing, and you know, getting that husband wife thing down pat. ;)

    I pray that you honeymoon will be a blessed time, drawing closer to your hubby. :) Have fun!

    Angel

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  3. Frannie,

    You are wise beyond your years dear one:)

    God Bless you and your beloved as you partake of your sweet honeymoon:O)

    Iam Wife,Mother and Grandmother,
    Blessings!!!
    Nancy

    ReplyDelete
  4. good thoughts that are so true! this made me laugh! we just went to a lake side cabin where we were all alone for a week and it was the best! After all the stress of working and wedding stuff we needed to just relax and get to know each other.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Aww...Enjoy your honeymoon! ;) You'll love it!

    We spent our first week of marriage in a cabin at the base of Mt. Hood in Oregon. It was important to us to not to head straight to our home in Missouri, but instead take that time to get away to somewhere where no one knew where we were and where we wouldn't be disturbed. It was perfect.

    Now every anniversary, we save ahead to get away somewhere for a few days. It's a lovely time to put aside the craziness and busyness of life to just treasure our love. <3 We just keep having one honeymoon right after the other..hehe!

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  6. * Miss Elizabeth, I always enjoy your thoughts! Thank you for the well-wishes ... I am very excited for our trip!

    * Angel, ah, your trip sounds lovely! It seems to me that unique, private cabin hide-aways are becoming the thing right now! And that is a trend worth following! :)

    * Miss Nancy, thank you so much for your kind words! I look forward to hearing from you again and possibly getting to know you better -- I always love meeting new friends. :)

    And thank you for your well-wishes -- we leave in a few days and I couldn't be more happy.

    Blessings!

    * Charis, your honeymoon sounds so nice! What a perfect place to get to know each other! ;) Those times will always be rememebered! <3

    * Oh, Amelia! Hello! Your honeymoon also sounds wonderful ... and what a great idea to set some aside so that each year is spent in a special fashion. I could definitely learn from that!! Love to you, pretty lady!

    ReplyDelete

Hey there, darling!

I'd love to hear your thoughts -- leave a comment below and I'll do my best to give you a reply. There is nothing sweeter then hearing from my readers!

Love, blessings and a steaming cup of coffee,

Frannie Anne

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