My Testimony

Hello sisters! I have been wanting to write and share my testimony with you all, but just had not gotten to it. . .until today. I was filling out an application which asked for my testimony and thought I would get two thinsg done at once! :) I pray that the Lord will use my story for His glory as we all grow closer to Him!

My testimony is one of God’s unfailing faithfulness, forgiveness, love, and complete freedom He gives from bondage. I was born into a Christian home and raised in a Baptist church where Bible verses were lovingly taught and a personal relationship with Jesus encouraged. When I was about five years old, I remember asking Jesus into my heart, and from then until the age of twelve or thirteen, I lived a sweet and “good” child’s life. While I do not believe I was truly born-again, I do know that God used my child like faith and prayer as a way to keep me close to Him and as a stepping stone to true conversion.

Being a naturally timid and willing-to-please child, I did not struggle with being outwardly disobedient to my parents and was often called a “goody-two-shoes” by friends. However, because of this teasing, I often felt lonely and insecure. By eighth grade, these insecurities led me into peer pressure and I was willing to do whatever it took to be “cool.” It was also in eighth grade that I fell deeply into immoral sin, struggled intensely with rebellion, and told many lies. I believe that Satan had a real and strong grip on my life, because I was literally in bondage to some of my sins.

In August of 2005, Mom took me with her to Pennsylvania where I went to a church full of God seekings people and where I met two different, godly families. These families genuine love for Jesus was new and strange to me. The fact that their young people could be in mixed company without flirting and dating relationships amazed me. How was it that these young people could have fun singing together!? It was almost creepy. I knew that my church was missing something, but I still found this contagious and living Christianity very strange. But God had begun a work in me. I often struggled with not knowing if I was saved and this created intense fear in my life. Jesus used this fear to bring me to the cross, yet my biggest stumbling block was my love for my sin. I battled with Jesus for a few months. I remember the physical battle I struggled with as Jesus took away my chains of sin. I do not have a specific date of when I became a Christian. I believe that I became a Christian week after week as I slowly began to hate my sin and allow God to work in my heart. I do know that I was saved by December 2005, because I have a journal entry around that time. I know I became a born-again Christian because He lifted the extremely strong bondage I was under and that I had confidence of salvation. Jesus did a complete miracle in my life. I knew I was a Christian because I was finally living like one.

I have been born again for about five years now, and Jesus has brought me through so much. He had led me to the point of joyfully submitting myself to my parents, to dressing modestly and covering my hair. These past few years have been quite difficult for me in my Christian life; I have struggled with many of the good and life-giving commandments of the Lord (like willing and joyful obedience to my parents). But I am striving to press onward, knowing that Jesus is my salvation and He can make me whole.

Lately, Jesus has been teaching me to rest in Him. Because I had been struggling in my Christian walk, I had lost my confidence in Him and was vainly trusting in myself. After many hard lessons, He is gently leading me back to His promises, which say that HE is my strength, keeper, and love. I am also learning to be content where I’m at—in our new state, as a single girl, etc. And finally, He is impressing on me that I need to yield myself to my parent’s will again. I have a really good relationship with my parents, but my heart is not joyfully, obediently submitting to them. This is something I deeply desire, and trust God to continue working in me.

God bless you sisters, as you walk in Him! Continue pressing heavenward, for Jesus is waiting!