Fighting Captivity: Lust

There once was a girl who felt she could never find love, never find victory, and never find peace.

Sexual sins are the heavy skeletons we Christians like to bury deep in the back of the darkest closet; we fear that dragging out that ol’ bag of bones will make friends and family run fast in the other direction. We fear being vulnerable.

 I am no different. I’m scared to death to share my struggles with lust, masturbation, and pornography. What will my fellow sisters in Christ think? What if my friends see this? What will I do if Jim-dear ever comes across my blog? (Jim-dear=reference to future, unknown hubby J)

Nevertheless, I am so tired of hiding what Christ has delivered me from. I am tired of not being able to relate with others my own age because they see my head-covering and assume I’m from planet Perfection. I’m saddened by the lack of openness among Christian women struggling with lust.

So, this is my story. When I was in my early preteen years I discovered the captive-taking power of masturbation and pornography. My favorite websites to browse were chat forums full of vile sin. The sweet innocence my parents desperately tried to protect was thrown out the window by my very own hands.

The world tries to convince young people (and older ones, too) that freedom and happiness equates fulfilling our desires. This is not true.

I am so thankful that Jesus continued to pursue my wretched heart and eventually won the battle. I became a Christian. And life changed from that moment; I finally, for the first time in my life, had the ability to say no to my lusts.

So, this is where it is now. I still struggle. I still fail.

But Jesus still loves me.

I’m learning how to truly let Jesus be my all-in-all. I’m discovering that my loneliness and temptations are, more often than not, reminders that I need to draw closer to Christ.

Sister in Christ, I want you to know that you are not alone. I want you to know that Jesus really is all you need. I want you to know that it is totally possible to be pure and at peace with God.

Jesus is a real person. He knows our thoughts, ours pasts, and He still offers forgiveness and victory over sin. He frees the captives and He lifts the face of the ashamed and makes them whole.

Resting in His faithful person,

Frannie 

P.S. It is my heart’s desire for these posts to be encouraging and uplifting. I know there will be some who will shirk away from posts like this; that’s okay. And if you have battled the formidable foe, Lust, drop me an anonymous (or non-anonymous) comment and share your testimony or ways you have gained victory. Comments like that would be encouraging! I do caution giving only as much detail as would be honoring and edifying. Blessings to you!

Purposed and Good

All I know is that waiting is hard—waiting in a purposeful, fruitful way. Yet, this is exactly how I hope he waits: a time period used for others, God, and growing in maturity and wisdom. What I insist for him I insist for myself. So, let me wait and use this time for others, God, and catch hold of the opportunities given to grow in maturity and wisdom. Let me catch the vision of purposeful, wonderful waiting and blossom in the meantime.

Illustration by Edmund G. Fuller, published by Henry Graves & Company, London

Before we Proceed . . .

Today, I happened across this lovely video and just had to share it with you! (Especially since it went along with my last post! Coincidence? I think not!) This sweet couple and I are from the same town and I am so glad to see that they are sharing their wonderful, God-authored story!

 

May God bless you as He works good things in your life, sweet friends!

Much love,

Frannie 

 

 

 

What's a Girl to Do?

This bit o'  loveliness is right over here!

 

With quick fingers and a ready mind, the authoress will now attempt to share her heart within fifteen minutes . . . seeing that tardiness for biology class is not an option.

Ah, me. Ever since I turned the spritely age of twenty-one, my girlish hope of marriage have blossomed. However, unlike many of the females of my day, my hope is a little different. I do not hope to date around till I find the one. I do not hope to experience the wonders of hand-holding or smooching before marriage. I do not hope to fall madly in love with the one who I find smolderingly handsome or dashingly debonair. I hope for something else--for someone else.

I hope to be led into a relationship when I am ready, when he is ready. I hope to be guided by those wiser and older than me. I hope to keep my body and every wonderful, fascinating experience for him alone. I hope to fall fully in love with someone whose character is smoldering and who is daringly living for God. Sure, I do have physical likes (as in I do like brown eyes and I do love a good sense of humor) but I’ve found my sitting and dreaming over Mr. Right gets me nowhere except to a restless spirit and bugging out eyes. (Which we all know are NOT attractive.)

So, what can I do in the mean time? What should we do in the mean time? Continue checking out every cute guy for a wedding band? (Admit it, you do it too!) Continue spending hours dreaming about the day? (Guilty as charged.) While these things aren’t wrong, I wonder if they are the best? What in the world is a girl to do?

. . . .

We interrupt this program seeing that the authoress’ fifteen minutes have come to an end. Tune in next time for the conclusion of this fascinating article. (Don’t you love promoting?) J

My New Red, White, & Blue

This past week I did something remarkable, something unusual. I bought fabric and finished my project by the end of the week. Yippee!  This is certainly an unusual feat! The best, most remarkable part?: I didn’t even cry!

Aha! Truly my not crying over a sewing machine is a miracle; for years my Momma (and a few good friends) have patiently taught me how to measure, cut, and sew all while putting up with my fits of frustration and tears. And finally, by God’s grace, all their work has paid off.  Thank you Mom for being so patient with me (and for snapping my pictures!). :)

 

 

 

 

What thinkest thou?

  Dear friends, if you are one of my kind (you know, the clumsy-fingered, yardstick challenged, get-your-bobbin-all-tangled-up kind of seamstresses) take heart! It will get easier although it may take time. Trust me.

Happy sewing to you all!

Frannie

Why Love?

Why love?

Is it because he is perfection in human form?

Because she is always courteous and thoughtful

or that he always chooses the right thing?

No, perfection often falters into failings, thoughtfulness into forgetfulness, and right choices into rebellion.

 So why?

Because He loved before we were formed in the womb; loving while we were in sin. He first loved me when love was the last thing I deserved.

 It is His love which makes ours possible.

Home Sweet Home---With a Vision

Greetings in the name of Jesus Christ!

After three stretching, altering and amazing months I am now safely home. My trip to Ghana, West Africa was, putting it painfully simple, a blessed time. Three months of teaching and experience . . . how can I begin to share my full heart? First, thank you all for your prayers as I know that I had people praying for me and I know that your prayers were heard by our Heavenly Father.

I had hoped to be able to keep updates flowing out but . . . hehe, it did not happen. And that is okay! I need a little debriefing time anyways so for the next few months I'll be sharing my experiences and lessons which I learned while in Ghana. In the course of the thirteen week program we went through ten or so classes; quite a studious and stretching time! But I am so thankful for each class and the required work--it forced me to sit up and practice being a soldier.

I look forward to sharing as time permits--thank you all for your faithful stopping by!

God bless you,

Frannie

Waving Goodbye

Greeting of love in the name of Jesus Christ!

I hope this finds all of you well . . . are you relishing autumn’s sweet return? Is the cooling air, crisp night sky and coloring leaves ending your day a little more magical? It is mine; but then I guess feel that way about all four seasons. To realize the order, exact order, and detail within each season—it all speaks of a Creator’s hand. Enough . . . it’s 1:47 a.m. and I know that if I continue dwelling upon autumn another moment I will have a very difficult time settling my sentiments. :o)

You may wonder why am I up at such a wee hour? An even better question is why I have so much energy at this time. Ghana. Only two more days till we begin the first step of my journey. I praise the Lord—He has shown abundant mercy to me during this time of preparation. And so that brings me to my point: I am leaving! For the next three months you will have the honor of meeting my dearest friend, Momma! :) Lord willing, Momma will be posting little tidbits of my journey when she is able. I know you will make her feel welcome. :o)

Dear brothers and sisters in Christ, thank you for all of your encouraging comments on my trip. I have so much to learn while there so please remember to keep me in your prayers. . .I will need them! Until we meet again!

Your Ghana-bound sister in Christ,

Frannie

A Peep Into My Day

Today is a wonderful and full day—how you may ask? Besides the beautiful robin-egg colored sky and the breeze which sets all the leaves into a nervous shake my family is buzzing about their work. The school year has begun. Momma has been an amazing example to me over these past few weeks when two unexpected (but most loved and welcomed) students joined my brother for a year of homeschooling. This meant Momma went from the teacher of one to three; much hurried thought and energy went into the setting up of a lovely school room, ordering books, preparing schedules and so on. Any order-loving person must understand how feelings of discouragement and fear could creep into such an unplanned event. Nevertheless, I have seen my momma rise up and meet this challenge full of the grace of God. Truly, He will strengthen with all might by His glorious power.

“She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.

Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.

Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.

Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.

Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.”

This year is especially fun for me. My prior experience with home-schooling was my being the student and my classmates my brother and sister—I was never really involved in it besides actually doing it. This year, however, I am enjoying the blessings of being graduated and “Momma’s Assistant.” I enjoy setting up our chore Stations, being in charge of breakfast and purposing myself to defeat the ancient foe: Laundry. It’s fun jumping into the classroom’s Bible time—singing “My Country Tis of Thee,” gazing at Abeka’s flashcards while we go over the story of Abram and Sarai’s move from Ur. I enjoy taking Momma her coffee and watching my young cousin rub his “Great Job” sticker in hopes of it being a scratch-and-sniff. :) Most of all I enjoy spending time with my Momma--watching her teach little ones in patience and knowledge. It’s fun being on the opposite side of the spectrum; being able to help with something versus spending my every free moment in a struggle with math.

And so, once the last of breakfast has been put away and a load of laundry is running I’m able to slip away and work on something Ghana related. Only seventeen more days till we begin our journey towards Pennsylvania and only twenty more days till I fly away. There was once a time when I wished Ghana would approach faster now I wish time would settle itself down and take a break. :o) However, through it all I must say that Jesus Christ and His Father are my hope and stay. They are my expectations and my fortress. My Shelter in the time of the storm.

Many blessings to you all. “For this cause we also, since the day we heard it, do not cease to pray for you, and to desire that ye might be filled with the knowledge of his will in all wisdom and spiritual understanding; That ye might walk worthy of the Lord unto all pleasing, being fruitful in every good work, and increasing in the knowledge of God; Strengthened with all might, according to his glorious power, unto all patience and longsuffering with joyfulness; Giving thanks unto the Father, which hath made us meet to be partakers of the inheritance of the saints in light:”

With love,

Frannie

The School Room  was painted by Alfred Rankley and can be found at the following link: http://www.oceansbridge.com/oil-paintings/product.php?xProd=74746

“Lord, Send Me Anywhere”

Have you ever waited for something with so much excitement it literally feels like your body is going to explode into party confetti? :) Have you ever experienced the mixed emotions of pure sitting-at-the-edge-of-your-seat with utmost dread? The: I cannot wait to begin packing my suitcase jumbled together with “Ah!! I have to sew four dresses?!” Welcome, to my world—a little bit of every emotion running 75 miles an hour throughout my body. I have 25 more days till I fly away to Ghana.

Along with all of these bothersome feelings comes the awesome realization that I am not alone. My Jesus, my Father, He is with me. He has faithfully met my needs financially, mentally, physically and even emotionally as I prepare for something I believe will change my life. And He is going with me; what an awesome God I serve.

David Livingstone and Frank Garlock are responsible for the following hymn. I found it very comforting and very challenging and I pray that you will be blessed by it.

 

Lord, Send Me Anywhere

O Lord, since Thou hast died
To give Thyself for me,
No sacrifice could be too great
For me to make for Thee.

Refrain:
Lord, send me anywhere, Only go with me;
Lay any burden on me, Only sustain me.
Sever any tie, Save the tie that binds me to Thy heart—
Lord Jesus, my King, I consecrate my life, Lord, to Thee.

I only have one life,
And that will soon be past;
I want my life to count for Christ,
What's done for Him will last.

Lord, send me anywhere, Only go with me;
Lay any burden on me, Only sustain me.
Sever any tie, Save the tie that binds me to Thy heart—
Lord Jesus, my King, I consecrate my life, Lord, to Thee.

I follow Thee, my Lord,
And glory in Thy cross;
I gladly leave the world behind
And count all gain as loss.

Lord, send me anywhere, Only go with me;
Lay any burden on me, Only sustain me.
Sever any tie, Save the tie that binds me to Thy heart—
Lord Jesus, my King, I consecrate my life, Lord, to Thee.

With blessings,

Frannie

Summer Afternoons

It's eleven o'clock, dear readers, on a summer afternoon. I look out my window and see a collage of beauty--hues of green, sky blue, white and hints of yellow stream into my room as I lay on my bed with a cup of coffee, a warm chiwawa and a biography to keep me company. Please don't think me too lazy; I just finished a good week of hard labor and a morning of serving yummy cinnamon rolls and smokies to twenty-nine campers and staff. :) 

Then followed that beautiful season... Summer.... Filled was the air with a dreamy and magical light; and the landscape Lay as if new created in all the freshness of childhood. ~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

And that brings me about to my topic--my campers. This week I had seventeen campers who eagerly appeared each meal time and also came in thirty minutes prior and afterwards for kitchen duty. Because Discovery Ministries is a Christian organization we typically have church related groups; however, this week was different. This group was a non-Christian group made up of junior high kids who came from military families. Because of this camp's make-up I prepared myself to have a very non-spiritual week. I was so wrong.

According to one of the leaders, one of the girls saw my "A Tip for Ghana" jar. After reading it she ran upstairs where the simple tupperware canister was passed from hand to hand filling with love, goodwill and money which could have bought candy bars and soda. When I appeared the next morning to start my ovens and set up the counter I was tremendously blessed to see that they had put at least thirty dollars. Thirty dollars worth of Snickers, Sprite and iceceam bars where given to an almost-complete stranger who is trying to go to Ghana for a missions trip. And the amount grew as the week progressed.  These children were so excited to give something--their joy and complete willingness encouraged me to keep going. They encouraged me to keep looking unto the Lord. Last night I told the Lord that I am trusting Him completely; if He desires me to go He will provide. I also told Him that when He does I will be as David and sing praises.

O God, my heart is fixed; I will sing and give praise, even with my glory.  Awake, psaltery and harp: I myself will awake early. I will praise thee, O LORD, among the people: and I will sing praises unto thee among the nations. For thy mercy is great above the heavens: and thy truth reacheth unto the clouds. Be thou exalted, O God, above the heavens: and thy glory above all the earth; That thy beloved may be delivered: save with thy right hand, and answer me .God hath spoken in his holiness; I will rejoice,

. . .

Give us help from trouble: for vain is the help of man. Through God we shall do valiantly: for he it is that shall tread down our enemies.

  Psalms 108:1-7a, 12,13

Altogether this group gave forty-seven dollars--I told my campers that, although some may find the amount small,  their firty-seven dollars could be the exact amount God will give in order to meet my need. My Abba not only used these young people to provide physical needs but also spiritual--He used them to strengthen my faith, encourage me my heart and also chide me for the times I have often been stingy in giving. I praise God for using this week for my complete good.

I hope that you are all well and enjoying summer; I think before I drift asleep I should talk a walk to the mail box and see if there are any goodies inside. :)

May the LORD bless each of you today! Yo u all are so dear to me!

With a smile, 

 Frannie

P.S I have two very good sites I would love for you to visit. First, Miss Sonja from Girlish Musings recently wrote a most excellent piece concerning followers and our hearts toward them. Please drop by and read this; it was quite challenging for me and I feel the need to pass it on.  Also, please visit ButtonWillow Chronicles. I recently found this and I truly enjoy stopping by--its a breath of fresh air! :) Blessings to you!

Hello!

Greetings dear friends! It has been so long since I last wrote--I hope you all don't think I've fallen off the earth! No, I haven't fallen away life has just been busy! :o)  School is almost finished for this year; I am really looking forward to having time for other things--things like catching up on letters and making dresses!

Our dear home is beginning to look more and more home-y. We had HAD a schedule for moving from the basement to the upstairs but the vast amount of rain we received last two seeks ago moved things along. :o)  My family and I had been blessed to travel to Illinois to my grandparent for Easter Sunday (and we had such a good time). But while we were gone we had our dear friends and at the time house-itter call and notify that our basement was flooding!  (Oh No!) I praise the Lord for the help our friends gave us--one family came and vacuumed water out and lifted our belongings off the floor while the poor house-sitters (who got WAY more than they bargained for) did their very best to mop up floors and live in a clammy and moist area. We are truly blessed! The Lord was also good to us in that He was faithful in meeting our needs--His grace was more that sufficient as we were up late vacuuming water.

The first night wasn't so bad; we got home from our trip and immediately went to work--I think our adrenaline was pumped up. However, when the waters began to seep in the second night I will say that I was tempted to cry a few times! (And while they won't admit it. . . I think the boys considered doing so too! :o) But God was so faithful and my sweet family kept lifting and encouraging one another. My brother and I kept trying to find reasons to laugh (to keep our spirits up) and so in honor of the situation I compiled a few of our funny ideas and up-beat conversations:

1. "Look on the bright side, it could have been sewer water!"
2. "It's a good thing we haven't put carpet in yet!"
3. "The wise man built his house upon the rock . . . and the rains came tumbling down!"  (Notice that the rains did come )
4. Dad: "I think you're just pushing the water around."
    Me: "What do you mean? I had to fight the beaver and cross the swamp to get this far!" (After I had been
    mopping a puddle for quite some time).
5. Me: "Well, I guess I can be a farmer's wife. . .I passed test #3."
    Brother: "What do you mean?"
    Me: "Well, I've plucked chickens (test #1), I've done hay (test #2), and now I've had to deal with some sort of hardship (test #3). You can't be a farmer's wife without passing those. :o)
6. "Teacher, I don't have my homework finished because it floated away!"
7. "We could have had carpet down here and this could have been sewer water!" (I repeated this one on purpose because out of all of the above I think it was the most important reason to smile!)
8. "At least we have an upstairs to move into."


:o) I'm so thankful for all of the help we received during that time. We were blessed because we only got about 1 1/2 inches of water in our basement and I believe some in our area got much more.

Since we have moved upstairs alot of progress has been made. I have put some before and after photos for you all.

                                                               Kitchen: "In the Beginning"

Kitchen: Progressing 

Kitchen: Now :o)

                                                                     Left to Right View

Dining Room: Before

                                                                  Dining Room: Now

                                                     
                                                        Laundry room with floor and paint

                                                               Dining room light fixture

We're getting there! :o)  Soon the appliances will be in (I cannot wait to have an oven to cook in! Hmm...what should I bake first--crescent rolls or cookies? Or perhaps a hearty casserole?)  And I literally am bubbling over with anticipation when I think of being able to use a real sink! Hurray!

Today is a very special day. My dear friend and sister Allie is having her 20th birthday! Praise God!

I have so enjoyed Al--she is growing into such an godly young woman. She is my late night bedtime giggler, my fellow home-keeping trainee, the gardener, the fisher, she is the fire-cracker queen,my sister in Christ, and my friend. God bless you Allie as you enter this new era in life--the Golden Twenties! :o)

I love you!

Don't leave yet, I have one more thing to share with you all! :o) Missions is something which I feel the Lord has placed a desire for in my heart and I have sought out various opportunities to try and prepare myself. I found out this week that I have been accepted to attend a three month missions training program in Ghana, Africa! Praise the Lord! The program is with Charity Christian Missions--I will spend three months a a student in study and hands-on experience all while learning more and more of what is means to be disciple of Christ. I am really looking forward to this opportunity and I trust that Christ is in control.

Dear friends, please keep me in your prayers these coming months. Pray that I may rest in the Lord's timing and will and that he would prepare my heart. Also, please pray for my authorities and fellow classmates--that they each may receive a special blessing as they also prepare! And finally, please pray for my family as I prepare to go. . .I think that will be the hardest part! (For both them and myself!) I thank you all in advance for I know you will remember me. . .I'm truly am thankful for you all. Even though I cannot physically see you I am always so excited to be connected by Christ.

Thank you for sticking with me through this longer post! I hope to soon talk about all the blessings I received from the Ladies Conference!

May the Father bless you as you walk in Him! With love, 

Summer with a purpose: Week Nine!

Greetings dear sisters in Christ! I hope you all are well and had a lovely day!

Another week of summer has passed on and I’m left to ponder how well I used it. I did not have a very productive week at home this week, but I did get a few things done.

Reading: This week I’ve been trying to work away at Are You Serious About Marriage? by Susan Zakula. This book is filled with godly wisdom and I have really enjoyed it so far. One particular section spoke greatly to me. It reads,

“Similarly, young women who have been in the working world have a difficult time changing their focus. They may make a great effort at finishing the ‘housework’ so they can go on to the more seemingly important things in life. They do not realize that making a happy home and meeting their husbands’ needs are the important things in life. As a woman grows in the Lord, she begins to realize that what her husband thinks is important IS important.”

 p. 26,27

I know that I have often struggled with the “I must get the cleaning done so I can do things important to me” mind set. I’m reminded of a saying which says “If a things worth doing, its worth doing well.” Ah, how true this is! How many times have I hastily dusted the furniture, skipped over changing my sheets, and put off the laundry? Too many times. I believe that part of training to be a godly woman and helpmeet is to diligently apply myself to these important things! I am so thankful the Lord has opened my eyes just a little to this important lesson and I hope I learn it well!

Anyways, it is my great hope to finish this book this week!

Cleaning: I was able to tidy up my room and go through a few of my decorations. This was such a blessing because my dresser was starting to collect more junk than pretties. I’m very excited because it is now orderly! :o)

Special Things: This past week I was very blessed to start working full time at a nearby day-care. God was so faithful and timely in giving me this job and I am learning so much! One thing God has been teaching me is to love little children. To many people this comes very natural, but I struggle with impatience and the unkind thought “If these were my children.” :(  I confessed these feelings to Momma and she gave me some lovely advice: Talk to Jesus about it. Jesus already knows my struggles and faults and He can help me. And you know what? I prayed about it, and I felt a love and patience the very next day! God is so faithful! I know this all may sound silly, but patience and gentleness is something I need to learn. I feel like this job is God’s way of trying to teach me! While learning this lesson I was reminded of Titus 2:4 which reads,

“That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children,”

I had never given that part of the verse much thought. To love their children? That seems so easy, but is it really? Is it really easy to truly love anyone who is disobedient and sometimes selfish? For me it isn’t. But as Jesus loves me, though I am often disobedient and selfish, so I need to love others. And what does it mean to “love their children?” I feel like I have much to learn from this verse and am very excited!

One extra special thing is that I was able to go on a float trip with my family today. I was very blessed to be given the day off and truly enjoyed God’s beautiful creation and my family’s company!

Well, that is about it for my week.  I hope you all were able to be more productive than I. God bless your night, dear sisters, and let us continue pressing on towards Christ!

With love,

Frannie

Picture Credit: This lovely painting was created by Helen Allingham.

Happy Mother's Day Momma!

"Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised." Prov 31:31

Happy birthday and Mother's Day, dearest Mamma! I know we all love our mothers, but just as the Bible says, " Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her" (Prov 31:28) so I am excitedly rising up to bless my dear Momma. I am so thankful to have her as a teacher of school, womanhood, and housekeeping. I am blessed to have her as my confidant and best friend. I am glad to have her as my example of a mother and wife. If you cannot tell. . .I love her totally and dearly.

Such a fun and sweet mother!

Momma earnestly and excitedly using the saw while helping Daddy fix their bedroom's floor.

How sweet!

Isn't she lovely?

Momma, thank you for listening to my hopes and secrets, my confessions and upsets. Thank you for teaching me lessons I should have learned long ago and for laughing at and with me. :) Thank you for being a sweet and submissive wife-an excellent example. And for being a faithful and good mother. I hope to be a blessing to you in your future and to bring you lots of joy and smiles. I LOVE YOU and praise the Lord for giving me to you and Daddy!

"Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all." Prov. 31:29

With lots of love,
 Franniegirl