I'm twenty years old, but I feel like the bloom of romance which had swept away many of my childhood friends never came. . .until now that is. And along with this intence desire to be loved comes an intence desire of discontentment. Yes, that horrible struggle of self fighting against the good will of my Father. Sin.
God designed me; every freckle, strand of hair, my very veins He lovingly and wisely put together. He knows me and is personally aquainted with my past, present, and future. He has watched over me from my sweet childhood years to this glorious, yet difficult time of being His growing little woman. As I look over my short life I see His loving and perfect hand in everything. From my dear parents and my raising, to my awarness of sin, to my first heart break, all the way to a terrible church split I see how His hand has guided me, using different things to bring me closer to Him. With confidence I can look over almost every time in my life and see how God has used it; I can say that He is wise, all-knowing, and perfect in His ways with me. Now, can I say that about my singleness? Can I in contentment trust Him and give up my hopes and day dreams knowing that He, as He has been all my life, is in control? Can I lay my will for a family and husband down and pick up His? In my head I know that God's will is perfect and is for my good, but in my heart and will I resist, afraid that He has plans for me that I may not like. Oh, that I may learn to simply trust and obey, to trust that whatever He has in store for me, marriage or singlehood, Mrs. or Miss, is all for my good and for the glory of His kingdom? I trust I am not the only one struggling with this.
Here are some droplets of advice which have blessed me:
1. Singlehood is a wonderful opportunity to wholeheartedly serve my heavenly Father and Husband, Jesus Christ.
"The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit:" 1 Cor. 7:34a
We must remember that to give up our life for God's glory is the highest calling. Never, think of maidhood as something horrible. It has many blessings. Remember also, the unmarried missionary legends who accomplished so much for God; at this moment I can think of Gladys Alward and Amy Carmichal, to very admirable women.
2. Remember that God hates covetousness and that my "eyeing" other young men is just that. {We must remember that that young man may be someone's future husband, or he may be set aside for singlehood by His heavenly Father. In either case, he is not mine}.
3. When I begin to be carried away with day dreams, remember that my time is not mine. "See then that you walk circumspectly, not as fools but as wise, redeeming the time, because the days are evil." Eph. 5:15,16.
Also, when catching yourself day dreaming remember Phillippians 4:8,9 which reads,
"Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things."
Are my thoughts pure, true {did that or will that really happen?}, and of good report {would I allow others to see what I'm thinking?}.
5. Give your heart to your parents, specifically your daddy. Make yourself vulnerable to your dad; cultivating a relationship with him may seem strange and difficult, but the blessings far out weigh the trouble! Take responsibilty for yourself and work on the relationship. Ask your daddy what makes a good wife, ask him to help you grow in godly character. Ask him for his guidance and wisdom concerning boys. Ya know, he knows them best! :)
Share your heart with your momma; tell her your hopes and dreams and ask her if you can be accountable to her. I can guarentee you will be blessed!
6. Finally, remember that Jesus loves me, knows what I need best, and that His timing is perfect.
"Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.
In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths." Prov. 3:5,6.
Ah, dear sisters, isn't it good to rest in our Heavenly Father? I struggle so often with it, but I know that He is good and in control! Let us grow in trusting Him, giving up our dreams for His! To end, here a two very good quotes by Jim Elliot:
"God always gives His best to those who leave the choice with him."
and
"He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose."
With love from your fellow pilgrim,
This lovely painting was taken from: http://www.greatmodernpictures.com/vwc.htm
I've always thought God wanted me to be single. And a missionary, of course, single or not. You could share the gospel much better and really be into what you were doing than to take care of your family. I'm not saying no one should be a Mother, I would die without mine! (or rather, I wouldn't be here without her)
ReplyDelete