The Simple Things

Some days my sentimental heart beats with extra energy. I suppose that's the beauty of being made a woman; we were created to be capable and strong and yet given the great privilege and need to be soft and gentle. I can roll with the day-to-day business and punches of life but eventually I need something else.  I need simple things like:

Toast with homemade strawberry jam (given by a sweet friend)

A toddler who find great delight in playing with bark and rocks

Cups of hot black coffee

Eating Mexican with a mom who loves to speak Spanish to the waiter

Spending one-on-one time with mom. Period.

Household chores

Little people who love soaking their feet in a bucket of cool water on a hot April day

A clean bedroom

Waking up early for Bible reading

Wearing aprons

Reading Little Women and laughing at Jo and Amy's quarrels, Meg's wifely faults, and sighing at Beth's sweet modesty

Finding contentment in the power and goodness of God

Visiting  Button Willow Chronicles 

A brother who delights not only in throwing dirty Q-tips (at innocent sisters) but in bringing Tylenol and water when those said sisters have a fever

Delighting in the virtues of an April springtime day

Pictures via Pintrest

And finding my heart peacefully wanting His dreams and desires

And shall I pray thee change thy will, Father,

Until it be according unto mine?

But no, Lord, no, that never shall be,

Rather I pray thee blend my human will with thine.

I pray thee hush the hurrying, eager longing,

I pray thee soothe the pangs of keen desire,

See in my quiet places wishes thronging,

Forbid them, Lord, purge, though it be with fire.

And work in me to will and do thy pleasure,

Let all within me, peaceful, reconciled,

Tarry content my Wellbeloved's leisure,

At last, at last, even as a weaned child.

 

- These Strange Ashes, by Elisabeth Elliot



Via Big House in the Little Woods

These are a few of my favorite things; these impersonal objects, routine happenings and average delights lend a hand to calming frazzled days.

My Resolution

Today, I stand on a terrifying brink. My tipped-up toes have me leaning over the edge; an edge which is crumbly, steep, and dangerous. If I step off I know I will fall--and the falling will be painful.

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It's the cliff of being in a shell. A shell, you ask? Yes, a shell; you see, I have a line drawn clearly in my imagined sand and I automatically have two choices. Will I stay on the safe side and enter into a cold, hard barrier? Or, will I step across the line and inedibly be forced out of my crusty shield. Will I fall into vulnerability?

My young twenty-two year old heart is coming to a conclusion: there will be disappointments and hurt in this life. My first natural reaction is to retreat to a safety zone. If I don't love, I won't hurt. If I don't care,  I can ignore mess-ups and wear my brazen suit of armor daring the world to come at me.

But that is not what Jesus wants of me.

Fulfil ye my joy, that ye be like minded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind.

³Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves.

⁴Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others.

⁵Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus:

⁶Who, being in the form of God, thought it not robbery to be equal with God:

⁷But made himself of no reputation, and took upon him the form of a servant, and was made in the likeness of men:

⁸And being found in fashion as a man, he humbled himself, and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross.

I serve a God Who had no shell; He was open and vulnerable. The Son of Man, the King of kings hurt and cried. He, who is lifted above all, came as a weak, fallible man. And that man made of himself no reputation; he didn't even try to get the good-Christian, spiritual reputation. He became a servant; He was submissive, broken, giving, loving. He became obedient unto death.

So here am I, one large form of dust and frailty, thinking that I could have it different. And I suppose I could; I suppose I could lock myself away from the pain and anxiety that results from living. I suppose I could become hard (ahem, bitter) and impenetrable. But the day that happens I lose.  I fight the design the Creator has for me.

I choose. I choose to step off the edge--this is my resolution.

 I will love.

 I will care.

 I will be cry, be repentant and vulnerable.

I will live.

A Day in the Life . . . of a Newbie

♥ After quickly dressing and brushing my teeth I partake of a much wanted cup of black coffee

♥ Jump into my little red truck and drive west pulling into my cousin’s driveway 15 minutes later

♥ Begin our day with the book of James and spend a bit of time trying to memorize James 3:13 . . . how I love this passage.

♥ Math time! (We like to begin with our hardest subjects.) Carl undertakes the huge task of correcting math fixes while Carsoi gleefully approaches decimals; he has found “points and and's” much more pleasant than three-digit division.

♥ Grammar and history class begins. With my two pupils studying different subjects I enjoy a bit of refreshment as we discuss the virtues (and characteristics) of adverbs and adjectives. How I love knowing the keys to unlocking the doors of difficult diagrams. If it ends in an “-ly” it is automatically an adverb while “a, an, and the” are always adjectives. Fun!

♥ Lunch/Break time

♥ History and grammar class: in reverse. This time I get to observe Carl’s creative writing skills as she reads a paragraph, writes an outline, and then shares with me the peskiness of a certain beetle coming into America through Japanese cargo. I also had the blessed opportunity to threaten the confiscation of cell phones if the use of Facebook ever steals her attention from cursive again. :-)

♥ Switching to science, I spend time preparing Carl for her quiz tomorrow while helping Carsoi read with understanding (my most commonly said phrase). We’re learning the steps of the water cycle along with the creatures of the sea.

♥ For a special treat we jump into my truck and speed off to McDonald's where we order ice-cream and head to a park. It is here, in the fresh air, where spelling tests are taken and giggles escape as it seems no one is completely calm while enjoying their treats.

♥ And so ends my school day with the cousins. I‘m now sitting in my school’s library making an outline for a soon-due history paper; oneday the never-ending will end! :-)

 Ah, it is so obvious to me how much I have to learn. Sure, the school day sounds pleasant and easy above but how often did I lose my temper or fear that I was incapable of teaching two dear but independent children? While driving toward school today I felt the urge (oh alright, I admit that I did) grumble. But the Lord in His tender mercies gave grace. Before I knew it I was singing. Sure, I knew the day was not going to be easy but I also knew that I was being called to do something worthwhile—invest in lives.

And that makes me, the newbie, very happy.


*Here at the Cousin's House we enjoy making names for ourselves hence Carl and Carsoi--two very dear young people.

Savior, Teach Me Day by Day

Savior, Teach Me Day by Day

Savior, teach me day by day
Love’s sweet lesson to obey,
Sweeter lesson cannot be,
Loving Him who first loved me.

With a child’s glad heart of love
At Thy bidding may I move,
Prompt to serve and follow Thee,
Loving Him who first loved me.

Teach me thus Thy steps to trace,
Strong to follow in Thy grace,
Learning how to love from Thee,
Loving Him who first loved me.

Love in loving finds employ,
In obedience all her joy;
Ever new that joy will be,
Loving Him who first loved me.

Thus may I rejoice to show
That I feel the love I owe;
Singing, till Thy face I see,
Of His love who first loved me.

Words: Jane E. Leeson, London 1842.

Going On

"The kind of religion that God requires, and will accept, does not consist in weak, dull, and lifeless "wouldings"--those weak inclinations that lack convictions--that raise us but a little above indifference. God, in his word, greatly insists that we be in good earnest, fervent in spirit, and our hearts be engaged vigorously in our religion: "'Be fervent in spirit, serving the Lord'" (Romans 12:11).

Jonathan Edwards, A Treatise Concerning Religious Affections (1746)

It all began with an outflowing of tears; I sat, Bible open, sun shining, pen in hand . . . feeling empty. You see, I am human and beyond this blessed fact comes an even greater certainty: I am a girl. With with these two concrete factors I face a world, a foe, which wants my destruction. He's a vicious enemy; he fights against me using my emotions, my feelings (or lack thereof), and my faults. And I fall for it. The moment I don't feel loved, I don't feel God, I don't feel . . .  I falter. And just like the foolish man who built his foundation upon the sand--great is the ruin thereof.

So I live. Frustrated. Irate. In a numb and angry stupor. Oh, I know that the Christian life isn't about me but the more I fight for my feelings the more wounded I become. Life happens; people fail; expectations are not met. And the more I insist upon feeling like acting Christianly the more I don't. Patience ceases, quiet times end, love becomes mechanical, and fear doubles.

Then the phone rings and after exchanging various bits of news a question is asked: "So, how is your quiet time going?" Gulp . . . how do I explain (without sounding apathetic) that my quiet time is faltering at best; that I feel God is disappointed; that I don't feel?

Honestly, there is no way for I am, for-better-or-worse, transparent. My attempt at sounding spiritual falls flat and even I--my biggest supporter--knows it.

So I sit, Bible open, tears flowing. "God, I know I'm failing. I know my reactions toward people are wrong. I know I've been relying on an experience. But why would you not give me training, why would you not give me accountability, why would you make me stand alone?" I pathetically sniff, looking about my room when my eye catches a title. Sermons of Jonathan Edwards, a sweet Christmas present from my momma, catches my eye and then my Lord spoke.

"You say you have no teacher, no leader and yet I have given you exactly that. Do you see that book?--it has the spiritual wisdom you seek. Do you see your open Bible? It's My Word. It's far more leading than any person. Do you see the godly heritage I've given you? It has lead you thus far and will continue."

"Do you see, Frannie?"

"But God hath chosen the foolish things of the world to confound the wise; and God hath chosen the weak things of the world to confound the things which are mighty; . . . That no flesh should glory in his presence. But of him are ye in Christ Jesus, who of God is made unto us wisdom, and righteousness, and sanctification, and redemption: That, according as it is written, He that glorieth, let him glory in the Lord."

"Your lacking wisdom, righteousness, sanctification, and redemption are made even--no, made overflowing--in Me. And if you will follow Me  regardless of feelings, nay, in spite of feelings I will lead you. For I am the Author and Finisher of your faith. I have placed you here and I want you to know me."

So here I sit; my tears are dried and my Bible closed but my path clear. And I am so glad I follow the One who is the way, the truth, and the life.

♥

A Governor's Home & Reunion

Greetings!

Black steel gates, an observatory and green house, large pillars on an elegant entry way, private garden and fountain.

Welcome to the Governor's home.

Isn't it lovely? As my brother and I strolled arm in arm I was able to admire this now toured home. I wish I had had the time to peek inside.

Beyond the mansion stood the Jefferson capitol building;

and a variety of tulips, dogwood, and other floral beauties.

Wonderful sculptures of the Lewis and Clark team.

And my handsome brother looking into the far, far distance while I . . .

. . . have a seat.

And later share a meal with my reunited family; how nice it was to have my mom and sister home!

Many blessings to you!

Frannie

A Week of Firsts

Greetings of love to you in the name of Jesus! I hope this finds you all well and enjoying the beginnings of April! My, how this year has spend by! Only four months ago I was spending my days in Ghana and here I am enjoying (and adjusting) to hot Missouri sun. J

This last week has been amazing; one chucked full of challenges and small victories. I name last week the Week of Firsts. Firstly, J I began teaching my two younger cousins. They have had a great year of homeschooling with my mom but due to some scheduling changes I now assume the role of teacher   . .  . gulp! I find the irony unpleasantly funny--my major is elementary education—and yet teaching two of my own relations terrifies me. I am terrified over the vast amount of work involved, spooked at my own inabilities, weakened by my very see-through attempts at patience and a sweet teacherly attitude.  But friends God has been so good! I praise Him for His outstanding faithfulness. Every day I am given strength and new hope; a bit of patience arrives exactly when needed with every undone math problem. He is so good! And I am so excited to be teaching these very dear young people.

My second first of this week involved quality time with my brother . . . shopping . . . looking at swatches . . . and tuxedos. (This is when it gets hairy.) My! I had no idea the amount of work that went into picking your man’s suit. Would you like your white dress shirt in microfiber?  Your tie-- will it be striped, solid or paisley? A long jacket or short? Pleats or no pleats? And colors? Oh dear . . . which would match best: malibu, turquoise, Riviera turquoise, blue . . . or fushia? So many choices! But I am so thankful for the helpfulness of the store owners, a patient brother, my mom’s opinions and such nicely laid out catalogs.

Disclaimer: When my special guy needs to wear something nice I’ll be happy with something much simpler. Say, a white buttoned shirt. But that’s just me. <3

And first number three? I taught children’s church; normally Momma teaches this class but since she is out of town I tried to fill her--large—shoes. With three students it was fairly stress free (yes, I do stress over these types of things). Our subject today was obedience. The children colored while I read a story about Nigel and Nellie: two siblings who took small steps toward disobedience and ended up with big consequences. Afterwards I poured different cups of Tang (this was my favorite part). I obediently followed the directions for one pitcher trusting that the creators knew what they were saying  when giving directions. But for the second pitcher I disobeyed the directions and, thinking I knew better, added lots of salt into the purple drink. Needless to say, I hope the children will never forget how bitter disobedience is. J

Altogether, this last week was wonderful. Sure, there were moments when (I felt) crying was the only sensible thing to do or when feelings of being overwhelmed seemed to be natural. But that’s exactly what those moments were: feelings. I praise God that He is greater than my fickleness or stress. I praise Him for being faithful in teaching me while I was busy teaching.  

May the LORD bless your upcoming week!

Frannie